"The Miracle Of '04 Would NOT Have Taken Place IF We Ever Had THIS GUY"

Need I say that based on his Games 4 through 7 Performance in '04, that Red Sox Nation would've looked at '04 as just another lost Winter Of Discontent?


Imagine his throws ending up on Yawkey Way, instead of 1st Base?


That slap made him look like a 4th Grade Girl, who just might be more-mature than he is;


The ONLY Pitchers he hits, usually are pitching with Groin Pulls, especially if they're rookies;


Big Papi saved his arse in the '06 All Star Game In Pittsburgh. ONLY, Miguel Cabrera can imitate him by being a diva;


He actually does play a much-better Shortstop than the Highly-Overrated(By Tim Mc Carver)"Captain Intangibles", one Derek Jeter;


Posing Half-Nude in Central Park, in a NY Post Photo-Op, made this guy, the favourite Poster Boy in Greenwich Village, which isn't a good idea for a married man;


Rarely hits the Game Tie or Game Winner;

Only hits big with the team being 9 Up or 9 Down;


Combined with slapping the ball out of BRONSON(Not Brandon, Tim)Arroyo's Glove & wearing Blue Lip Gloss, have you ever wondered why, in Red Sox Nation, you're called "Slappy Mc Bluelips";


Or why Mets fans, who either see you playing, or someone has the audacity to wear a Yankees #13 Jersey to Shea Stadium, the chant of "Gay-Rod, Gay-Rod, Jeter's Boyfriend, Jeter's Boyfriend", always is utilized, even though you & Jeter are at war in the Clubhouse;


Thank Goodness that Manny Ramirez never got traded for you, Alex Rodriguez, for we would still be hearing "1918" chanted at Yankee Stadium, as we speak;


&, Oh, Theo? It was the Best Trade NEVER MADE;

Thanks!


PS: Oh, & to Fred Wilpon, Mets Owner;

You really did your homework on this Scott Bor*** Practical Joke & kept "The Curse Of A-Fraud" away from Corona;


Kudos to you, who, like me, hails from Brooklyn.

(Credits-Stock Photo)