"TOP 10 NY Mets Excuses For NOT Going To Post-Season"
#9:Raging, Raving Phone Calls To Our Loser Owners From Mel Gibson;
#8: Daisuke Matsuzaka, we thought, was a new dish, so we got Scott Schowenweis, instead;
#7: We're Way Too F---ing Old;
#6: We missed being mocked by Letterman, in his nightly monologues & TOP 10 Lists;
#5: Just the Sound of Tim Mc Carver’s Voice, caused us to spit the bit;
#4:Jose Reyes’ Idea of Hustle, was a Disco Dance, imitating Derek Jeter;
#3:Who needs 2 Good Pitchers, costing $6.4M, when for the savings of $400K, you can get 5 Guys who SUCK;
#2:With Next Year’s Improvements, Fans will pay $7.75 for Warm Bud;
#1: Never mind “Wait’ll Next Year”-Wait’ll Citi Field where most real fans can’t afford it. Let them join their friends up in “The New Toilet”, Anyway, in The Bronx.