Top 10 Signs That The Wrong Person Is Singing Your Sunday Mass

#10: Cantor monitored by DEP Noise Unit;
#9: Alley Cats in a frenzy;
#8: Comments include ''The Spice Girls sing better than this'';
#7:When a high note is sung, car alarms go off within a 5 mile radius;
#6: Bomb scares are called to that Parish BY The NYPD;
#5:Cantor assigned because someone was made ''An Offer She Couldn't Refuse'';
#4: FDNY Trucks in Parish Parking lot, every time this Cantor sings;
#3: Instead of chants of ''Bravo'' and ''Bravissimo'', congregation is drenched by the sprinkler system; whenever Cantor ''Sings''; #2: Cantor is a Yankee Stadium Bleacher Creature, who can't even read, let alone sing;
#1: Record sales of tomatoes, reported in local stores.